traci hui: it my blog, yo. no promises

Tiramisic Proof

2011-11-08T00:11:00.001-08:00

ohohOH and here is the first piece of tiramisu photographic evidence! A very special Tiramisu Diagram obtainer was able to make said dessert for a housewarming party AND SENT ME PROOF!

I am so appreciative.

Some photos from APE 2011

2011-11-07T23:21:00.000-08:00

In case you weren't able to stop by, here's our table and what we looked like standing by it.

(Click to make the image bigger.)

And here's me prior to the show, working late into the night at my new medical X-ray light box, which I now love a lot. Look how hard I work for you. Just LOOK

Currently taking commissions!

2011-11-03T16:33:00.002-07:00

THE HOLIDAY SEASON IS UPON US.

Therefore I am now taking food illustration commissions, just for this reason. What are you giving for Xmas/Solstice/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa this year?

I can do: Pencil, black and white, full color, etc. I typically draw and ink by hand on Bristol board, add digital color, and print on quality card stock, although I can be talked into selling the original line art too.

Commissions are priced according to what you want illustrated (simple? complicated? 1 item, multiple items?, etc.) + what format you want + shipping. I'm currently just doing food only, please. Basic or limited environments, if any, and no people or animals at this time.

Email me at tracihui@gmail.com and share your deepest, darkest food illustration fantasies with me. Muahahaha
... if I think it's really gross, I just won't sign it.

Happy Brainstorming!

Tiramisu Diagram featured in TDAC!

2011-11-02T21:16:00.000-07:00

Just got the news that They Draw And Cook is featuring my tiramisu diagram this week, along with 5 other tiramisu-phile artists. Awesome!

Linky: http://bit.ly/sByeDn

*Note the slightly different layout (compared to the zine or the print).

APE 2011 in The Daily Californian - A write-up on ME!

2011-10-20T13:17:00.000-07:00

Can I tell you something excitingOKTHANKYOU

I got a write-up in The Daily Californian, in an article on APE 2011. I'm happily squished in between my favorites Kate Beaton and Shannon Wheeler, and the talented Matt Sundstrom! Thank you Sarah Burke, for the wonderful description. I'm positively chuffed. CHUFFED I tell you!

Here is the article in full:
http://www.dailycal.org/2011/10/10/alternative-press-expo-2011/

There is also audio commentary accompanying said article. Listening to these convention newcomers fall in love with comics because of their experience at APE just fills my heart with joy. That feels way less cliché than it reads.

OMG SRSLY w00t

15 minutes with Jennifer de Guzman (and The Smiths)

2011-10-12T16:47:00.000-07:00

Yayyyyyyyy, I'm going to draw Jennifer de Guzman's comic based on "Reel Around the Fountain" for "Unite and Take Over," the new Smiths anthology!

www.jenniferdeguzman.com

NOW FOR SALE: Twin Castle zine + 2 prints!

2011-10-10T20:00:00.000-07:00

Now you can buy my Twin Castle zine right here on this blogspot (ooh la la), as well as my Taco and Tiramisu diagram prints! Just click on those handy yellow "Buy Now" buttons in the nav bar on the left and you will get the goods, shipped direct from my zine-making lair. (International friends, email me about shipping.)

Anything else you guys want me to sell online? I mean, stuff I make, of course.

LAST NIGHT AT TWIN CASTLE ZINE - $7 +S/H. 2nd Printing!

TACO PRINT - $4 +S/H

TIRAMISU PRINT - $4 +S/H

FOOD YES, COOK NO #1 - $5 +S/H

APE 2011!

2011-10-03T12:05:00.000-07:00

APE was great! It's only my second time exhibiting and I'm excited to say things were all around improved from my first show. And the first show wasn't bad, either. :) I'm slowly figuring out what people like about my work and what of it they want to buy.

I sold out of both my larger prints (save for 1 copy of Midwestern Taco), and sold out of my new color zine "Last Night at Twin Castle." People liked my new illos of Twin Castle food, especially Mr. Friday Fishburger, the vanilla and Sharpied-chocolate Frostees, the most beautious (spelled wrong) corn dog, and the ketchup boats. It's satisfying to see people get enthusiastic about food I love. It also doesn't hurt that most of these foods are iconic-looking already, and sometimes even pretty. American fast food is certainly an interesting subject to draw.

So now what? I'm going to do a 2nd printing of Twin Castle zine and offer it up for sale online, as well as to some local retailers. I'm going to set up another Paypal Buy Now thing for it soon enough but for now, if any of you guys out here in Blogger Landia want to buy a copy, please email me at: tracihui@gmail.com and we'll arrange for it. It's $8 via mail (includes shipping) and I'll throw in a couple extra goodies.

Also, I few of you expressed interest in seeing me illustrate specific foods, i.e. "I would totally buy from you if you did a sushi roll," or "Hey, I like Reuben sandwiches." That got me thinking about taking commissions. Should I? ... Yes of course I should. But would any of you be interested in buying them? Email me if you're interested.

To conclude, here is Mr. Friday Fishburger (and friends). Enjoy! :)

End of July already?

2011-07-26T02:15:00.000-07:00

Holly carps, I cannot believe July's almost over already. I seemed to have skipped a whole month of posting! But I can assure you it was for a good reason.

Here are some of the things I've been working on as of late ...

A man talking into a cup and plate! Like you do!
A vector art test.

Mais oui! A french chateau!
A precursor to an art test.

And a special birthday illustration.
A personal art test. This image has been in my mind for months, and it's gratifying to see it out in the world now, so close to the original idea. I've always been frustrated by similar efforts before, so I feel like I've made progress.

These were good reasons, no? Best yet, I'm happy to report that the whole process is getting a little easier ...

.

Group Sketch in the Summer!

2011-06-29T11:33:00.001-07:00

(... Grooooooouuuuup Sketch, For EVAH! does no one else get this stuck in their head?) I mostly wanted to call it Group Sketch because it sounded like Group Sex.

ANYWAY, yes, a group of us braved the gloomy weather on Saturday to draw at the Conservatory of Flowers. The last time some of us had been there was back in school, when we had to draw 50 flowers and 50 trees for homework. I think maybe that's the last time I had used the particular sketchpad I had brought, as I found some old drawings of pitcher plants inside it! It was fantastical to be inside the humid white glass building again, albeit overwhelming. Next time we might choose to paint in it, instead of draw. But it was a great challenge for everyone (even the seasoned pros) so, Win.

Golden Gate Park trees. Trees are hard. Perhaps I could have chosen to focus on a single leaf instead.

When it got too cold (I think Lenny got frostbite on his fingers, haha), we took refuge inside the Velo Rouge Cafe to draw old ladies singing jazz and rock improv songs about how it's ok to be queer. Also we drew each other.

Next Group Sketch coming soon! I'm thinking maybe the Oakland Zoo?

.

Zombie Traci

2011-06-16T01:30:00.000-07:00

I caught Teh Crud. Teh Brain Crud.

Sickness compromises my brain, Roommate bails me out

2011-06-16T01:17:00.000-07:00

4 Sketchbook pages

2011-06-16T00:51:00.000-07:00

Bandelier National Monument, NM - Longhouse

Taos Pueblo Cemetery, NM

Brown Sugar Kitchen, Oakland

My dirty hair, Everywhere

Updated portfolio, a.k.a. Send work my way!

2011-06-14T20:18:00.001-07:00

Finally updated my online portfolio (and my resume, but I'm not posting that here). I've rearranged pre-existing stuff, added a gaming UI menu I did, added some illos in the Magazine category, and added a few pages from both my Sketch Blog and Sketchbook. I like this design a lot more; it's cleaner, simpler.

Let me know what you think. Click the "Portfolio-liolio" hyperlink in the sidebar, or go to: www.krop.com/tracihui
Thanks!

Experimenting with grey areas

2011-05-04T22:22:00.000-07:00

This reminds me of this thing we used to do in drama class where we'd take vague dialogue and construct scenes by projecting various emotions onto them.

Although this conversation sorta actually happened, give or take a panel.

Emeryville Cove is for da boids

2011-04-26T18:39:00.001-07:00

Did some East Bay sketching this Sunday, testing out a new pen. I forgot how nice it is to be specific in a drawing.

This is Eville Cove's bird refuge. For all the bird refugees. They come over 20-30 birds at a time, sitting on handmade rafts fashioned from bits of blown-out tires, so hungry – most haven't seen the sight of millet in days – driven out from their native home by bird oppressors, the anti-avian guerilla groups of Marin.

Anyway, at the Marina, I got us invited to a party hosted by the people who live in the boats. I would have gone, but the sun was setting, and it was hella windy. I stopped drawing not because I was done, but because I was too cold to stay there.
"Thanks for the invite guys, but I gotta go home!"
"No! We got food! And music!"
"I'm freezing!"
"We got blankets ..."

A comic journal page is in the works. IN MY MIND

Emo Storm Thoughts

2011-04-19T18:34:00.000-07:00

It's not often you can walk and smoke in Oakland without being asked for a cigarette, or money. So you have to do it when no one in their right mind would be out, like 2am in a miserable wet gale. Recommended!

Thinking aloud: Should I swap out the text above for the text on the sketch journal page, which is crap and annoying to read?

Gossip Day

2011-04-19T18:28:00.000-07:00

I thought about adding more of an explanation to this page, but decided I like it the way it is. For the time being.

Eventually you will notice that I am usually eating food, getting food, thinking about food, and/or drawing food ...

Tampocalypse 2011

2011-04-19T16:55:00.000-07:00

James Jean's sketchbooks are works of art unto themselves.

I draw tampons in mine. What.
-----------------------
Drew this one around the time drugstores stopped supplying o.b. tampons for several months, something about a problem with the distributor. That made no sense, but the end result was nothing but the hated Tampax, Kotex, and other such nonsense for a long-ass time. Boxes of o.b. were selling on eBay for $50. I was worried it might never return, although the fact that the empty spot in the Feminine Needs aisle stayed empty (rather than being filled up with other products) gave me hope.
Lucky for me, o.b.'s back on the shelves again. Just bought a box a few weeks ago. I almost didn't open it.

Dimsum, Hanae Mori, not looking away

2011-04-19T16:06:00.000-07:00

But then we healed.

Neither here nor there

2011-04-19T15:48:00.000-07:00

"She just wanted to pick some stuff up. No big deal."

"God I hate that time, that picking-up-stuff time. I just went through that before I came here. You know that song called, 'Patsy Cline Times Two' I play? That's about me and my ex dividing up our record collections."

"It's a great song."

"Thank you."

Sketch Journal, 1/11/2011 + Mission Comics

2011-03-16T16:37:00.000-07:00

And the good news is, City Lights wants more of my books than I expected, and now Mission Comics carries Food Yes Cook No too!

Life is good. (Despite the things you read in my sketch journal.)

Sketch Journal, 1/5/2011

2011-03-16T16:36:00.001-07:00

Sketch Journal, 1/4/2011

2011-03-16T16:23:00.000-07:00

Hey baby, can I make it up to you?

SOLD OUT at City Lights! Plus other illos: Best Friends Magazine + They Draw And Cook!

2011-02-23T01:08:00.000-08:00

Did a couple color illustrations for Best Friends Magazine, which will be out March 1st! Available at Barnes & Noble, Borders, Books-A-Million, and other such places. My art director Eric Evans was rad enough to snap these photos for me:

If that weren't awesome enough, I found out that They Draw And Cook posted my tiramisu recipe illustration. It's in color, baybay!:

http://tdac.neotericdesign.com/recipes/albertine-rende-tiramisu-by-traci-hui

Last, but not least, my quasi-cousin (quasin) Allen Hui told me I've essentially sold out of Food Yes Cook No at City Lights Bookstore! I've got to send over more copies, and I'm soooo excited about it.

Thus, I'm letting that encourage me to the point of following my friends' further advice to peddle my zine to other local bookstores. First on the list is my other favorite SF (book-related) institution, Green Apple! Wish me luck ...

Sketch Journal, 1/10/2011

2011-02-22T02:19:00.000-08:00

I personally think a 16-shelf white IKEA Expedit bookcase would solve all my room mess woes, don't you?

Hope everyone had a splendid President's Day weekend!

Sketch Journal, 1/8/2011

2011-02-14T00:46:00.000-08:00

I should not be awake at this hour.

Sketch Journal, 1/7/2011

2011-02-07T18:13:00.000-08:00

What criteria do you use to select jukebox songs?

In this instance, I chose mine in this format:
1) Past
2) Present
3) Future

Sketch Journal, 1/6/2011

2011-01-28T09:42:00.000-08:00

I'm going to try to post a page a week. They might not be consecutive pages, and I can't promise they'll be chronological, either. But a page a week, is what I'm starting with. Here's the 2nd installment.

Sketchcrawl!

2011-01-22T22:50:00.000-08:00

It's my firsta time. Got to meet lots of cool people and check out their sketchbooks, including Enrico Casarosa's! And Charlene (drawn above) surprised me with a belated Christmas gift, an amazing artbook called LA<>SF, by Christian Schellewald. Still wowed over that. Thank you, Charlene! <3

And thanks to everyone who came out. It was a good day.

A New Project

2011-01-21T22:16:00.000-08:00

Eric gave me a copy of EMITOWN before the holidays, and it inspired me to start my own sketch journal. I started on January 1st, 2011 and plan to draw a page for every day.

I showed a couple pages to P and N at our last Skype meeting and they suggested I post it online. So here's a page, to start. Maybe mine should be called EmoTown.

Homegrown Acme

2010-10-30T01:45:00.000-07:00

We used to do this in school – meet with professional artists over a video conference to review and critique our student artwork. I was too retarded and boy-crazy to take advantage of it then, thus I seriously lost out.

So when P had the brilliant idea to set up a small group Skype to talk about our current work, I felt like I'd been given a bit of a second chance. Our first meeting was today, and I asked them to give my portfolio a look. I told them I wanted to get a job in game art, and asked what they thought would help me bridge the gap (more like a great yawning maw) between my current work and said game job. I guessed it would be quite a bit, as I didn't think my work looked like any current game I knew.

P said I was closer than I thought, as my food zine illustrations reminded him of games like Mama's Cook Off, Cafe World, and Restaurant City. N suggested I do another one of my food diagrams, but in Illustrator. That's what I'll be doing this coming week!

I asked if either of them had ever played Pet Society. They hadn't, but started laughing (I like to think, in delight, but it could just as well have been derision;) at the images that popped up in Google. I'd specifically mentioned PS because, harhar, that was the game that made me first think about working in games. Point of Appeal #1: It's not strategy, war, or gambling. Point of Appeal #2: The look of the game is simple, Flash-based, cartoony, brightly-colored, and fun. Kind of right up my alley, right? Right?

The secret(?) teenage girl inside me would love it if her job was to come up with new animals characters, costumes, food, plants, environment and household props all day long. P and N felt there were still plenty of games that would need artists for this, for casual games. I was heartened by that. HEARTENED

Again, thank you, P & N. Looking forward to the next session ...

Updated portfolio + Gauguin

2010-10-27T14:39:00.000-07:00

Yep, it's updated. Added the recent food illustration bits and an excerpt from a comic I worked on last year as an exercise. What I want to do next is to work enough new stuff where it wipes out all the old stuff. I haven't colored comics in years, so I'd want to replace those samples with new "paintings". Those will probably end up being paintings of environments or characters that look like they could be in video games. (Just talking aloud here. It seems to help me focus.)
-----------
And speaking of painting, for some reason, I'm really itching to learn how to paint portraits. I've been learning to appreciate Gauguin lately, and last night I saw Portrait of Aline Gauguin (see below), and Portrait of a Young Woman Vaite (Jeanne) Goupil (see my tumblr) for the first time, and they both sent charges of excitement and possibility through me that I hadn't felt in a long time.

So anyone have any recommendations for classes or teachers here in the Bay Area?

(Totally by Gauguin and not me:)

My frendz make me weepy

2010-10-18T14:44:00.000-07:00

Nikki and Dela took this pic of themselves reading my zine. It makes me so happy, I had to share :)

It's over!

2010-10-17T23:09:00.000-07:00

Thus concludes my first show as an exhibitor at APE. It was pretty fun, and I was surprised and very pleased with people's reaction to my food zine and its related merch. When people like food, they really like food. Spoke to quite a few chefs, a farmer, a magazine editor looking for food illustrators, a writer working on a dissertation on 19th century food. SO COOL

I've gotten some great suggestions on what to draw next, as well as had some cool conversations about where to go from here. I sold more than expected, and folks took more of my business cards than I had anticipated (although I didn't run out, thankfully)! People responded most positively to 1) my buttons 2) my color prints of Midwestern Taco, Tiramisu, and Yogurt Parfait, 3) my picnic basket / 2-tiered candy dish displays.

Lots of people I knew also had tables this year, which was very exciting! Unfortunately I spent most of my time at my table. When I did attempt to explore the floor, I bought 2 expensive (for me) items, then quickly became overwhelmed with the amount of cool things to look at + my inability to buy said things. This secretly embarrassed me so much that I returned to my table without first visited all of my friends' tables. Sorry guys. I will have a better strategy next year.

If you're curious, the 2 things I bought were:
- Scott Pilgrim band poster from Hellen Jo (same one I first saw at my friend Jamie's flat in London, which was a surreal experience). She's one of my favorite local artists. (I gave her one of my zines YESSSS)
- Sketchbook by Daniela S (can't remember how to spell last name, can't get up to check right now cos my cat is asleep on my arms as i type). Amazing work from a Pixar artist, sketches of SF.

Lastly, had post-show ramen with my super great table-mate (that rhymes!) Charlene at Sapporo-Ya. So good! Even though I ended up too full for a Sophie's crepe after that. So sad!

All in all, it was a valuable and fun experience. Thanks for stopping by; I hope you guys had as good a time as I did. See you next year! :)

APE 2010 !

2010-10-13T21:39:00.001-07:00

It's been a while. Just writing to let you know I still think about you. And I miss you. How are you? I'd like to know. Write back, if you want.

I'm going to be at Alternative Press Expo this weekend. You should go! I'm at Table #660, with the formidable Charlene Fleming. I'm selling my zine, plus postcards, some color prints, and funny little food-related buttons.

... Will I see you there? I'd like that, also.

Love,
Traci

Colours is British for Colors

2009-10-28T05:39:00.000-07:00

But they say Inks the same way we do, so it's not totally confusing.

Colors in progress

2009-10-21T04:26:00.000-07:00

Kablammo, here is a teensy weensy preview. Still working on the colors, so shut up about my silhouetting for the time being.

1 week left.

Moar blue pencils! MOAR

2009-10-09T03:34:00.000-07:00

You are familiar with this image, no?

Progress

2009-09-19T01:33:00.000-07:00

A peek at more blue pencils.

Wacom doodles

2009-09-18T21:33:00.000-07:00

Pencil sample

2009-09-08T20:04:00.000-07:00

Here is where I'm at.

Food Yes, Cook No #1 is still available for sale!

2009-09-08T17:40:00.000-07:00

Reposting:
Finally I'm putting it up for sale. It was put together in November for APE 2008, and since then I'd just been too busy/lazy to announce its availability otherwise.

But suddenly I couldn't resist having the yellow "Buy Now" button on my blog, so here tis, with a coupla previews. No way can you read it from here, so you might as well get it.

FYI: If you buy it from me in person, it's just the $5, cos we ain't gotta do no crazy ship charges. Plus, you know, I can lick it or something. Or I can just sign it like a normal person. Whatever you want.

So if you were to buy a foodzine-related art print from me, what would it look like?
Please give me some ideas! Thanks :)

100 views

2009-08-09T18:54:00.000-07:00

I have 100 views on my blog. Not bad for not having officially announced its existence these past few months :)

So I drew 5 pages of my first short comic, in blue pencil. I'm reworking the staging of the fifth page, which I'll probably need new photo reference for, but I'm glad I figured out it needed changing before I wasted any more time on the wrong thing ... Actually I'm basically scrapping everything I had for the fifth page and will DEFINITELY need to reshoot photo reference. SIGH. I think I'll just start with a fresh piece of board instead of erasing this whole page.

My perspective skills are still as poor as I remember they were in school. I was hoping they would have improved with time, as my line sensitivity has improved since graduation. My instructors likened the process of absorbing lesson material to a snake digesting a rat. Or something. It's supposed to mean, don't think about it, just swallow everything we say now and you might understand what we mean later once it's all come out on the other side.

It was actually true in some cases. So make of that what you will.

Blue pencil page in progress

2009-08-05T03:23:00.000-07:00

MOAR PROOF
P.S. Those are my friends in my photo reference. Aren't they great? YES THEY ARE

The only good thing about August are the Leos.

2009-08-04T02:45:00.000-07:00

... the good Leos, anyway. I'm part Leo but you wouldn't know it.
Here are some sketches, wherein I discovered I love drawing people at shows.

Folks included in these sketches are: Bryce of Lakebed Recording, Roberto Miguel, and Star St. Germain.

My desk

2009-07-30T04:32:00.000-07:00

Wow, it's been a month since I've posted anything. Sorry about that. I am drawing again after some problems (some being life and some just being my lame brain), but I should have some blue pencil drafts to post soon.
I am working on one in this pic I took tonight:

So that's proof!

It's also photo reference time.

2009-06-25T23:43:00.000-07:00

Nibby tests

2009-06-25T23:26:00.000-07:00

Messing around with how I want to draw dis thang, so naturally I checked out my nib treasures. I have lots of good ones! And so far they are pretty fun to use, too.

Now if only it wasn't so bullshit to scan.

Now it's under-drawing time. I'll check in later.

How Hair Flirts

2009-06-19T18:23:00.000-07:00

Almost ready to draw, but still on these damned storyboards! Well now I know I take longer in pre-production than I usually anticipate. WELL DONE ME, I GUESS.

In the meantime, here is a study on How Hair Flirts:

Hit a snag

2009-06-17T00:10:00.000-07:00

I have become obsessed with Roy Orbison and have been listening to him nonstop repeat (except while sleeping) for the past 3 days. Incidentally – and I hope these things are not related – I have not been able to produce any good work for the past 3 days also.

Today I experimented with a couple computer-drawing approaches that failed utterly. I was trying to be more direct about it, and most of all, I just wanted to save some goddamned time. Pencilling, inking, scanning ... wouldn't it be great to condense those 3 steps into 1 by just drawing it directly into some photoshop file?

Unfortunately, my pshop doodling working method is totally incompatible to the 2 short stories I wrote recently. But really, the bottom-line is: I'm just not good enough at tablet drawing to justify using it.

So I'm literally back to the drawing board. I'm behind on my personal schedule but I'm sucking it up. Wish me luck.

What I had for lunch today

2009-06-12T18:05:00.000-07:00

Teehee

2009-06-11T00:04:00.000-07:00

Still working on storyboards/layouts. Which for me, takes FOREVER.

Zig Millenium .05 Pure Black Pen + Hellen Jo = <3

2009-06-09T20:55:00.000-07:00

Ignore the inking on the large hands. The others are better, no? hopehopehope
I was copying the hands and feet Hellen Jo does. She makes it seem so easy.

Body sketch

2009-06-08T19:32:00.000-07:00

Alright, here's the first attempt at drawing them without reference, and with body & head attached.
oh my god i need to get back to figure drawing UGGGGHHHHHHHkillmenow

Mo character sketches

2009-06-08T03:57:00.000-07:00

Thus mo blatant ripping off of fan pics. I found the man quite tricky to draw (without the famous musk ox stripes in his hair, anyway). I'm not happy with any of these but the bottom right one. Doesn't look like him, but a striking resemblance is not what I'm after. Of all his chameleon-like incarnations, this specific look and feel is just right for the character I have in mind. Luckily it's also the least stiff of the bunch, so I hope that means it won't be too much of a drag to repeat.

And here's something from the first sketch page again. I was practicing with different inking pens. The left one took DONKEYS to dry ... won't be using that pen for this project, methinks (it's a brush pen I bought from Kinokuniya that I normally looove). The one on the right was inked with both a plain old Tombo and a Faber-Castell artist pen. I might stick with that combo until further notice. Yuck I need to practice more.

Character sketches

2009-06-07T02:48:00.000-07:00

The first (but not the last) sketches!
Totally based off one of my favorite SGs. But hey, I do what I can to stay motivated.
Speaking of which. This is what I actually consider Being Naked On the Internet. ::shudder::

The 2nd best thing about James Iha

2009-06-06T19:24:00.000-07:00

He "is a second-generation Japanese-American, and is only able to speak a little Japanese." (Wikipedia)

"Oh, I'm sorry"
I'm not against learning that language of your native cultural background at all. If you know anything about me you know I've always regretted being unable to speak Cantonese. But it's hella annoying how it plays out almost every single time. Once the Chinese figure out you don't speak your home tongue, they act as though you've not learnt it out of stupidity, laziness, or sheer defiance. And then in a split second, you become a non-person, akin to a very young child, or perhaps a dog or cat. In the rare instance a Chinese person would continue looking or speaking to me after they discover this shocking flaw of mine, they'd express their pity and/or disgust quite clearly, and THEN commence ignoring me. I can't tell you how many times this has happened, and how many more times it will – predictably – occur in the future.

This used to shame me before, as I absorbed the idea that my sister and I just weren't smart enough to be good Chinese kids. Sure, no one ever spoke Cantonese in the house unless my parents were fighting (and they didn't want us to understand what it was about). Sure, no one ever thought we should try to learn Chinese until I was 15, when the rest of our first level classmates were 5 or 6 years old, and all the teachers looked at us and said "Good Luck" with their eyes and proceeded to treat us as described above. And sure, being unable to learn Chinese reading, writing, and speaking strictly by rote memorization only served to enforce the idea that my true identity (or at least half of it) was going to be completely lost to me ... wasted on an ungrateful dumbshit American-born kid like me.

Sure this is how it panned out early on, but I assumed it was my fault for not overcoming the obstacles anyway, since all the other Asian kids in my school also had less-than-perfect parents, but STILL they got 5.0's, played a perfect game of tennis, were key members of 7 different social and academic clubs at once, attended every lunchtime Agape meeting, play virtuoso violin/piano, AND STILL they could speak unaccented Chinese to their so-pleased grandparents every weekend at dimsum. How could I still think I was just as smart as those kids (if not smarter in some cases) when I couldn't even figure out how to do just 1 of those million things they juggled daily?

15 years later, I'm not ashamed anymore, and I especially don't compare myself to most other Asian kids anymore (doubly-true when they resemble the kids I grew up with, even slightly). I decided long ago that it wasn't healthy to care about the Why-Aren't-You-Like-Them's, since all I could ever seem to manage was to be myself, anyway. This is the only Traci I am familiar with. So if I still lack after all these years, FUCKIN TOUGH SHIT

And anyway, I AM going to learn Cantonese, so keep them friggin shorts on. But please just give me this: I need to get all the other languages out of the way first – because I know I can learn them fast and I'll enjoy it – but most importantly, I need to know first that it's not because I'm dumb or lazy or that I hate all culture except for the white-American one that I can't speak Chinese yet. I need to have these other languages under my belt because maybejustmaybe that's what it will take to finally muster enough courage to learn the one language that makes up the other half of my biculturalism. Deal? OK deal.

After all this time it's still hard to reconcile certain disparate parts of me ... and here in the first 45 seconds of this 1992 interview, all Iha has to do is laugh and think, Honey, don't you know I'm still a rock star anyway? and then proceed to rawk Tokyo's face off. Hence the 2nd best thing about James Iha, learned here:

Goddamn I need a haircut.

2009-06-02T01:14:00.000-07:00

I can barely see anymore. Perhaps the length of my bangs is becoming oppositely proportional to the fatness of my wallet.
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I've written some travel articles for Trazzler, which you can read here.
Those were a lot of fun, and I hope to write more soon. Let me know what you think, or if you have any suggestions for new trips to write about. So far I've only got local stuff but then again I haven't been trazzling for years now, other than to LA or Kansas for family. Getting domestic fever ... MUST FIX SOON.
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I'm not allowed to enroll in classes right now, so we're taking the summer off from ASL. We're meeting with our ASL buds every week to sign anyway, to stay loose and improve our fluency, so it's not a huge loss on anyone's part really. But the best part about taking the summer off? Instead of going to ASL class, we're going to study Italian and French at home, for FREE.

I'm hella excited, especially because language learning programs have dramatically improved since last I studied German or Cantonese. I realized just recently that language study during my academic years was so shit; I feel like our generation was cheated in this regard. Rote memorization? Focus on grammatical correctness over conversational skills? Mandatory language education starting at age 15 instead of nursery or grade school when the learning is easiest? All written comprehensive tests, but rarely expressive or oral testing? Fuckin-A, you dumbasses. That makes no sense.

So here I am at 30, trying to learn all the stuff I wanted to know at age 15. A little late, but luckily my brain is way more receptive to actually absorbing the material (for good) than it was in the day of braces, acne and freshly-broken teenage hearts ... Except now it's dental insurance, acne, and constantly-reshaping adult hearts. Heh, I guess some things never really change all that much.

Vintage Paper Fair treasures and such

2009-05-30T00:04:00.000-07:00

Found some nice shots last weekend:

The bottom right reads: HOW A WOMAN CLIMBS A FENCE. It looks fantastic in stereoview. I would
really like one-a dem stereoview thingamawhatchits. Then I could look at the rest of my small collection.

Written on the back in cursive: Guess who?

This one makes me think of Ted Hughes and Sylvia Plath without fail.

The light in this one, the quiet mood, the old-timey but still with-it grandpa. Reminds me of Grandpa Leung.

-------------------------------------------

And now I'm off to eat a sandwich. MADE OF ICE CREAM.
I leave you with this:

Traci: What's that buzzing sound? A fly?
Damon: It's your cat. Snoring.

Covet

2009-05-23T02:08:00.000-07:00

Turns out, you CAN put a price on nerdness, and that price is nearly half my rent.

So. Bananas are cool.

2009-05-22T01:59:00.000-07:00

Am I right?

Food Yes, Cook No #1 available for sale now

2009-05-19T11:37:00.000-07:00

Finally I'm putting it up for sale. It was put together in November for APE 2008, and since then I'd just been too busy/lazy to announce its availability otherwise.

But suddenly I couldn't resist having the yellow "Buy Now" button on my blog, so here tis, with a coupla previews. No way can you read it from here, so you might as well get it.

FYI: If you buy it from me in person, it's just the $4, cos we ain't gotta do no crazy ship charges. Plus, you know, I can lick it or something. Or I can just sign it like a normal person. Whatever you want.

Oh man.

2009-05-19T01:29:00.000-07:00

It's bedtime and all I want to do right now is live in New York so I can order 24-hour Ma Pa tofu delivery. Also I want Tofu Fa. So a 24-hour Chinese grocery would be pretty handy right now too.
My sister sent me this pic of her and Mom's dinner because she unconsciously knows that THIS is one of the few things I really miss about living in Alhambra, and she wants to send me psychic (not to mention gastronomical) pangs of regret for not living there anymore. She is evil. We can all agree.
No Chinese food might be the only drawback to my plan for European domination, I can see that now. I was going to use off-color wording to phrase that sentence but instead I'll just say that the punchline was "chink in armour, get it? hahaha!", and otherwise keep my racist jokes to myself. For me, By me ... FMBM.
I know you're grateful to have been spared. You can pay me back with a lifetime of servitude, or alternately, you can take me out to an Ocean Star, or an ABC Cafe. Your choice, I'm easy.

Stolen spot

2009-05-17T15:26:00.000-07:00

This is not my cat, Crow. This is Damon's cat, Suki. She's sleeping in a stolen spot. Let me explain.

MY cat likes to hang out with me at my desk while I'm working, even though there's barely any room left for him. There are endless stacks of books, pens, discs, magazines, postcards, gallery pamphlets, fashion catalogs, letratone sheets, takeout menus, receipts, you name it, it's all here, and my cat has to work around them.

Lately he's been resigned to staring at me, and then at one particularly large pile next to the window, then back at me, then sighing. He paws at it, and sometimes he tries to sit on top of it. Inevitably, he gives up and then just lays down on my arms. If you've ever tried to work without the use of your arms, you're awesome, because personally I find it quite difficult.

It's been like this for months, as I could just not find time to deal. I just built up a lot of forearm strength as I developed a new method of typing that allowed for simultaneous cat cradling. But since my work situation up and changed, I finally got the chance to do this obviously super important thing in my life. Yessss. It wasn't easy but I banished the pile in question, and then installed a makeshift catbed in its place.

I was proud. He laid down it in once. Then that was it. The next morning, I found Suki (this grey one in the photo) enjoying it thoroughly, while Crow was lying down on the floor in the bathroom.

That was 2 days ago, and even though she's not sick or anything, she still has not left the bed. She's there right now, her legs are all twitching and I can tell she's totally massacring an entire flock of geese in her sleep. Or maybe sparrows or some mice. But all I can think of now is, how often do cats need to get up to pee? Or eat? Previously I thought it was at least a few times a day, they'd at least get up and cat stretch. But there's no evidence to support that theory now.

So. Should I kick her out so that Crow can take his rightful spot back? She just looks so damned comfortable.

Or does the root of the problem stem from the possibility that I have just made the most comfortable catbed ever known to catkind?

ooohooh she's moving

... nope, she just changed positions.

Have I condemned Suki to a certain, slow, motionless death by allowing her to slumber in this stolen gift of wonder? Should I try to rescue her from her terrible yet deceptively pleasant fate??

Let me know. I've got to get back to work.

Last minute dental

2009-05-14T16:20:00.001-07:00

I knew it.

Even though I take care of my teeth more carefully than Damon, it turns out that I have 2 cavities and he has NONE.

Please tell me how this is fair.

Hair haiku

2009-05-14T03:01:00.000-07:00

I want this haircut

But it would be bad for me.

Boohoo I'm not cool.

HEH RO

2009-05-14T01:28:00.000-07:00

Bonjoo. Since I can't seem to figure out how to set up my actual blog, I figured I should make it less hard on myself and do it through blogspot like all the cool kids are doing.

I might take a tip from Jillian Tamaki and disable my comments, but since I only have 1 follower now, there's no urgency. Comments are cool and all but even if I don't really care if I get them or not, it reminds me too much of the comments competition on SG. Suddenly I care if I get 1 less comment than I did with the last post, and I start whoring out pics of myself to get my readership up. Funk dat ... I just wanna POST, man!

Welp. Let's see how long it takes for me to get another post up here. Not to mention pictures of my work.

lub,